Stuff you should do if you went to Hogwarts
by The mysterious apple
Summary: Here is a list of things you should do if you ever went to Hogwarts.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello this is a list of things me and my bro made up. I'll be publishing this till Christmas so enjoy and please give me some ideas. Some of it is Kiwi oriented because i'm a new zealander my self. **

Make the sorting hat your friend.

Meet up with the sorting hat every now and then for a game of poker.

Have a movie night every friday night.

Play Frozen at said movie night.

Play Star Wars at movie night.

Play the Matrix at movie night and confuse people into questioning their own existence.

Go up to Draco Malfoy and give him ten reasons why a muggle could beat a wizard.

Make technology work at Hogwarts.

Host an epic rap battle of history.

Give Nevile a hug.

Give Harry a hug.

Give Luna a hug.

Give Ron a hug.

Give Draco a hug.

Give Fred and George a hug.

Give Snape a hug.

Give Ginny a hug.

Give Hermione a hug.

Give everyone a hug.

Have a day when all the food has something to do with apples.

On the 25th of April go around and give everyone a poppy. (This is the day we commemorate all the soldiers killed in the war and the poppy is the flower of that day.)

Don't work on the 25th of April because its a public holiday.

Have a dance party.

Have a doctor who day.

Ask Gilderoy Lockhart if he has an army of sparkles.

**So till next time, please review. **


	2. Chapter 2

When Umbridge talks about who would want to hurt children mention the hunger games

Have a five nights at Freddy's marathon included second game.

Introduce minecraft.

Introduce Vocaloid.

Introduce anime and manga.

Introduce the internet (include youtube, facebook and google.)

Introduce Xbox, playstation, wii and computers.

Ask why there is no p.e

Ask why there is no math.

Ask why there is no English.

Ask why there is no science.

Ask why there is no social studies.

Ask why there is no health ed.

Ask why they only play quidditch.

Ask why there is no swimming lessons.

Have a culture week.

Run up to Mcgonagall and yell "Kitty."

Introduce Sims.

Create Draco in sims and kill him over and over again.

On Halloween dress up as slender man and go around scaring people.

For Christmas give snape some shampoo and conditioner.

If you run into Dumbledore scream "I don't want any lemon drops."

Discuss favourite books with hermione.

Burst into song in the middle of class.

Challenge Ron to a game of muggle chess.


	3. Chapter 3

When talking to harry about how he can speak to snakes yell, "die Orochimaru."

Sing the Lord Millennium song, to creep people out.

Go up to Dumbledore sit on his lap and say, "okay Santa for Christmas I would like…"

throw coconuts at people.

Go up to professor Flitwick and ask him to teach you how to use the force.

Challenge a ghost to an eating contest.

Introduce Parvati and Lavender to twilight.

Ask Quirrel if the vampire he met sparkled.

When meeting Voldemort ask if it was really worth it giving up his nose for immortality.

Get Dumbledore to dress up as Ganfalf and say, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS."

Dress up as the evil queen from snow white and hand out apples saying in a creepy voice, "one bite and all your dreams will come true".

Sing the pokemon theme song in care of magical creatures.

Do the mean girls introduction with the golden trio.

Ask the hufflepuff house why their mascot is a badger because it should be either a bee or a otter.

Ask why ravenclaws mascot is an eagle because its confusing.

Make professors sprouts nickname beansprout.

When given a box bertie botts every flavour beans create a game to see who can get the best flavour.

DON'T GET KILLED.

Corrupt 1st years

When a teacher takes house points off you say,"am I bothered."

Shout I like Trains and see what happens.

When harry gets called up in the goblet of fire shout,"I volunteer as tribute."

At a death day party sing ghostbusters.

Find the wizarding world equivalent of the hunger games.

Bungy jump off the astronomy tower.


	4. Chapter 4

Slide down the staircases.

Find Trevor.

Find the recipe for Hagrid's rock cakes.

Go up to Draco and and say,"I ship Drapple."

Teach Fred and George the wonders of shipping.

Find the Crumpled-Horned Snorkack's.

Ask Snape if his face is stuck scowling.

Host a bake sale with the rock cakes.

Go up to Ron and say,"I ship Chickron."

Ask Lucius if he's secretly an elf.

For Christmas give everyone pens.

Create a new name for S.P.E.W.

See Barty Crouch Junior, scream the Doctor.

Bring a magic 8 ball to divination.

Everytime you see Sirius shout,"why so Sirius."

Get Quirrell some speech therapy.

DON'T GO INTO THE GIRLS BATHROOMS ALONE.

When Quirrell comes in screaming about the troll tell Dumbledore to report it for abuse.

Ask Hermione how she deals with her hair.

Sing its a small world to annoy people.

Tell Dumbledore you found his son, show him a picture of Gandalf the white.

Reenact the mysterious ticking noise.

Tell voldy he looked better under the turban.

Die Snape's hair Neon green.

Every time you see Lupin ask for chocolate.


	5. Chapter 5

Act like your way to happy to be in potions. (especially if you're not a slytherin)

When someone falls asleep its totally fine to draw on their face.

Throw Mrs Norris into the black lake.

If you forgot to do your homework just say fluffy ate it.

Hop on a broom and fly around singing "Defying gravity"

Start a chain Howler.

When it starts snowing sing let it go

Create a rumor that a cupboard in the school leads to Narnia.

Each time you see Snape around Christmas yell,"run its the grinch".

If you see a death eater with a white mask sing anything for phantom of the opera.

Tell people that the real way to time travel is not with the use of a time turner its doing the Time Warp.

Go around hissing a people and when people ask you why say,"Harry hissed at people and that made him the most feared person in the school."

In the battle of Hogwarts yell," THIS IS HOGWARTS!" Then rush into battle.

Refer to the Accio charm as the force.

Every time you see a ghost sing Casper the friendly ghost song.

For Christmas give Sirius and Remus a flea collar.

Every time Umbridge does her, "Hem hem" thing go up to her and give her a cough lolly.

When something that makes no sense happens just roll with it.

Every Time you get a new pet bring it to Crookshanks to make sure its not a creeper.

When meeting voldemort its not wise to laugh no matter how funny he looks.

Tell first years to befriend the whomping willow.

Sing the song that never ends to the whole of Slytherin.

Walk around with a ring in your hands well muttering my precious and hiss at anyone who tries to take it from you.

Ask Gilderoy how he ever became famous.

For Christmas dress up as Santa and give apples to everyone.

**Merry Christmas everyone and if you don't celebrate it enjoy the last few days of 2014. **


End file.
